Journeying together

It's been really interesting for me on the days that I take the train. I'm not sure who puts up the signs on the buildings I pass but there are two buildings (one for each route I take) that both have the same sign on it: 'Take Courage'. The last couple of years whenever I saw these signs, I kinda smirked and wondered who put them up and why. In recent weeks, I'd been reading a lot about living the crucified life and the fear of God. (In case you're curious, my current default non-Bible book is 'Embraced by the Cross' by L.E. Maxwell) I was rereading Luke 12 this morning: 'But I will show you whom you should fear: Fear Him who after He has killed, has power to cast into hell; yes, I say to you fear Him! Are not five sparrows sold for two copper coins? And not one of them is forgotten before God. But the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Do not fear, therefore; you are of more value than many sparrows.' (Luke 12:5-7). Does it not strike you that on one hand we should fear and on the other hand we should not?

The fear of the Lord is the beginning of wisdom (Psalm 111:10, 25:12, 112:1, Proverbs 1:7, 9:10...). So, how do we fear the Lord? You will have heard that it is a sort of reverence and awe but if you're thinking of just standing there agape or saying something like "...hallowed by Thy name...", I would wonder if that would be evidence of wisdom. I was looking up the definition of fear and of course, most of them is the negative kind, which I will get to in a minute, but there was one synonym which I  quite liked as a consideration: concern (Something that interests you because it is important to or affects you deeply, something that you give your time and effort to). What do you concern yourself with? This is a fear "for" God. What about the other fear? If the first is a fear "for" God, the latter is a fear of "everything else" which mostly includes the fear for self. If you think about it, concerning ourselves with the things of God, will be His concerns too (i.e. concern for others). One major point that I've read from the 'Embraced by the Cross' book so far, is our identification with Christ in His death and resurrection and what that means (i.e. living the "glorious" crucified life and glory as in God's type of glory which was so beautifully described in my last book- 'We Would See Jesus' by Roy & Revel Hession). This type of fear is removed when we have the first type. I think of the verses that replaces the first type of fear with that all encompassing power of love: 'There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love'. (1 John 4:18) This seems closely linked to that saying, "He who fears God, fears no man". One fear displaces the other and logically, I would choose to fear the one who has more power as Luke 12:5 suggests.

I guess I've been thinking a lot about this as I find myself in situations where the unfamiliarity is daunting, where I realise I have no control, where I find courage lacking and in general, where the concern has been for myself. the quirky and fun remembrance of a VeggiTales episode where there was a song that played "God is bigger than the bogey man" is just one of those simple reminders that when we look to God, who is for us, we need not be crippled with fear. As Casting Crowns so nicely puts it: "How refreshing to know you don't need me! How amazing to find that you want me". We are of far greater value to God than we can imagine and abiding in His love is the secret of full assurance and safety. Amazing Love, how can it be that thou my God should die for me!

Anyway, I thought I'd tell you the above because all that including the relatively tiring weekend is exactly what I was praising God for this morning during my time with the Lord. Sure, if any of you happened to be one of those poor people that I had talked to since Friday you'll have known that I wasn't exactly in the joy of the Lord then and you'll have known how much of a struggle it is for me to "think positive" and what not. This morning, I was reading Luke 7. If you've gone to read it and am wondering what on earth this has to do with my long weekend, let me explain.

I was reading through verses 1- 10 and considering that same question. Who was I in this story? Probably not the centurion and since I have a cold, I was thinking probably the dying servant. :) Bear with me. What struck me as I was praying through this short passage was that the centurion had begged Jesus to heal his servant based firstly on the fact that the servant was deserving (v4). As a servant, what right do I have to demand to be healed just because I'm a "good" servant? He goes on to explain that this servant loved their nation and built them a synagogue! Wow, that sounds pretty impressive to me. Anyway, you know the story and that Jesus healed the servant because of firstly His great mercy and because of the centurion's faith. Imagine that this centurion, speaking so highly of his servant and yet humbled himself in his recognition that he was unworthy for Jesus to see his face let alone visit his house. Similarly, as a douloid of Christ, it is amazing to think that God holds us so dear that He would humble Himself (even more so) in the likeness of Jesus who goes before us, intercedes for us, suffers for us and died for us that we may be healed and delivered from death! What a reminder for a morning like this one after a week like that one!

Reading further into the chapter, He is the Lord of life! Not only does he save us from sickness and death but upon doing so, He is life itself! And then, of course, you read about the sinful woman who washed His feet with her tears and wiped them off with her hair. How much have we been forgiven? From what depths has he brought us from? In realising the wretchedness of my illness, His abundant life is that much sweeter. Yes, I am tired, I am weary, I am weak but He is strong, He is mighty and He never tires! As I sit here in the empty classroom, with my flask of herbal tea (make fun all you want), there is a light that shines brighter and beyond the dull, grey skies outside and I am eternally grateful for His assuring and life-giving presence! And as a bonus, God was gracious in taking away the sore throat this morning which would've been the worst part of this cold for the loads of talking I'm supposed to be doing in today's class. :)

Praise Him for He is Emmanuel, God with us, in us and for us!

I started my PGCE 3 weeks ago now. Just in case you forgot what that was, it's a Post Graduate Certificate in Education which means that I am on a one year course to train as a secondary teacher. Today was actually my 3rd day in a secondary school where I'm just observing lessons until they tell me that I have to do the starters or plenaries and then eventually, they'll get me to do whole lessons. I'll tell you that yesterday was a real treat as I sat in some of the maths lessons. They weren't brilliant but it was good to get a feel for who the school ran. I won't go into detail about what happened today though as in all honesty, I felt a little traumatised by the end of the day. I guess my lesson coordinator wanted me to see the range of class types from "top sets" to "bottom sets" but I don't think I had prepared myself for what faced me today. Praise the Lord that they have assured me I won't be teaching any of those classes (at least not whole ones) since this is only my first placement and they have special teachers and policies for those cases but when I think of any future possibilities of teaching in a school like this one...you can bet today made me rethink my "life choices". :)

It was a little depressing coming home to an empty house as well and I was so thankful to the Lord that my dad had text me just as I got off the bus and reminded me that I should be praying for these kids, for the teachers, for the school, and undoubtedly for this nation. The stark contrast of a desired classroom environment to what was today was a picture of how great the need for Jesus is in this generation. I guess I should've expected it and yet I still can't believe just how far today was from what would be the ideal classroom environment. Then again, I give huge credit to the staff in the school who are obviously very committed to the well-being and care of each child but at the end of the day, we are all limited and whatever we try to do in our own strength is short lived if at all effective. I think I should stop here, however, because I did just come home and in the state I am in, I would not be able to give a very accurate account. Whatever the case, please do pray with me for these students and indeed also for the teachers. After that, if you happen to remember that I'm in this school for 3-4 days of the week until February, please do pray for me too. Although I haven't really gotten into any "proper" responsibilities yet, I am starting to see how intense it is or can be. I'll admit that there are many moments where I feel overwhelmed with fear and doubt and it is especially at these times that I find just how great my need is of Jesus too.

Yup, it is not only that the unsaved need Jesus for salvation but we are all in need of Christ each and every moment of each and every day to live. For we can do absolutely nothing without Him (John 15:5). It is a daily looking to the Cross that gives us strength and hope. I am also thankful to the Lord that on top of His faithfulness in refreshing me in those quiet times of the early morning (4:30am starts for the school days these days), He has also brought about (as usual) surprise encouragements from various people. Thank you Claudine for your facebook message earlier today (if you happen to read this)! It come at such a time that I needed to be pushed onwards and upwards and a few others also who just remind me that this is where God has called me to be and that I just need to be faithful and press on, having the full armour of God (Ephesians 6). Yes, it is an ongoing battle and there are many fiery darts of doubt, fear, and deception but PRAISE HIM! He is my victory (John 16:33)! He is my refuge! He is my strength! He is my peace! His the great I AM. Just in case you're wondering, I was greatly encouraged and challenged about all this in the last book that I read, 'We Would See Jesus' by Roy and Revel Hession. It's one of those small, skinny and non-threatening-looking books and if you have not read it before, I really pray that you'll manage to pick it up and read it because it is all about Jesus and there is nothing else worth reading about besides Him, which is why reading the Bible should be first on anybody's reading list. :)

I guess I could go on and catch up with all the words I missed writing here in the last month-ish or so but I'm sure that wouldn't really benefit anybody so thanks for bothering to read this far and greater thanks for standing with me in prayer. 

Learning from the greatest teacher, the Lord Himself,

Debbie